GASP!
Me, sitting in front of my laptop early this morning, sipping coffee:
My first Wordle fail
-- gasp! --
Putin poised to invade Ukraine
-- gasp! --
Tennessee book burnings
-- gasp! --
People paying $1,000 to have sex in the sky
-- gasp! --
I see a pattern and sense a problem. These things are not equal. My gasps need more discernment! If you happened to be in the room with me, you'd have thought each and every gasp was reacting to something dire. Some of them were. But some of them weren't.
These last several years have primed our nervous systems to be on high alert. For many of us, this may have already been the case due to living in a country where our humanity isn't unilaterally recognized, protected, and respected, and the myriad ways this plays out, seen and unseen, on a daily basis.
Developing a steady, calm inward connection takes consistent practice, and ironically, it can feel like work to tap into that place of ease when outside conditions are constantly creating havoc. It's also something where, while we must do that work alone, it makes all the difference to also have some kind of support system, whether in the form of friends, partners, teachers, or spiritual community.
This is why spiritual bypassing is so toxic -- it puts the entire responsibility on the individual for their sense of wellbeing and safety, without acknowledging the impact and strain of cultural "norms" and punishing systems on one's being, and without recognizing the importance of interconnection and interdependence. It says, if you are struggling, you must be doing it wrong. It says, you can meditate your way out of this mess.
Not so much.
At the same time, where *can* we reclaim our own peace, even in the midst of very real threats? What does that look like in practice? How do we "do" it?
For one thing, it's important not to get snagged by binary thinking here. The idea that caring for oneself is intrinsically at odds with and diametrically opposed to being aware of and awake to what's going on in the world is a falsehood. But our culture loves this kind of thinking, as is evidenced by blue and pink, red and blue, his and hers, black and white.
It's like our collective startle response is at an all-time high. This in and of itself is dangerous, because as anyone with an intense startle response (or those who live with them) knows, a person can cause unintentional emotional or physical damage when they're in a state of heightened fear or reactivity.
But if we learned how to tend to our own frazzled nervous systems, if we practiced slowing down in our intake of headlines so that we could take in and process things at a more human rate and in a way that allows us to stay connected to our own bodies, what might shift, both individually *and* collectively?
Lately, I've been beginning to peel back some new layers about some old stories of mine, namely in that I'm seeing where, in the past, I took on the full brunt of responsibility for things that were not mine to carry. This way of relating to life overloaded my senses and ability to apprehend more accurately what was my work to do, what belonged to someone or something outside of me, and where perhaps a combination of the two was occurring.
How does this translate to a larger societal scale? We must continuously step back to see the bigger picture, and then step in close to look at our own responses. Some things are actual emergencies. Some things are not actual emergencies. And many, many things lie somewhere between, requiring our care and attention. For the latter, the more present we are inside of our own bodies, the better we can respond.
So, today's Wordle fail? Pfffft. I'll play again tomorrow.
Putin? Fuuuuck. I may not be able to do anything about this situation, but I can do my best to stay informed about it, along with so many other geopolitical crises with global implications -- all while remembering that no one person can possibly keep up with everything equally, but each of us can always do something in the form of a small action. Maybe this is related to refugees in your own community. That's the thing about activism; it's mostly not grand, sweeping, and overt. It's mostly mundane, ongoing, and decidedly minute. But all of that minuteness adds up.
Tennessee and our country's continued wretched and wrenching march ever more doggedly towards whiteness as greatness with its distorted definitions of "freedom"? This is where we honor John Lewis and heed his imperative: "You have to move your feet." It is one thing to read the news and despair, but hopelessness never moved the needle on anything.
Bottom line: Our bodies are barometers.
If we're so agitated that the mile-high club elicits the same gasp as people angrily throwing "Maus" into a bonfire, it's time to tend to our insides.
Whatever is on tap for your Sunday, I hope it includes some quiet time, some connecting with people you love and/or practices that restore you to yourself.
This world is a LOT. If you're paying attention, this country is exhausting. If you find yourself gasping indiscriminately, remember that tending to your body and spirit are *not* at odds with being of service. They are the basis for it.
And on that note, I'm going to close my laptop, make some oatmeal, and spend some time reading the novel I started yesterday.