The first came easily -- for Mani's health to be 100% restored. The others, though, I thought long and hard about as I drove south through farmland and evening light.
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What I can do is stay focused on the things that light me up, bring me joy in a deep sense, and make me feel most like myself rather than taking on more roles and tasks that I think I need in order to survive.
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I stand on the shoulders of those who embodied this most; I can only hope my actions align with my innermost heart, the blood of my ancestors, those whose minds may have been filled with doubt but kept walking anyway, those whose names are found on the train manifests to Auschwitz, those who braided the bread and lit the candles and buried the dead and praised the living.
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A month or so ago, I scheduled an appointment with my primary care doc. I had two items to discuss with him.
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Being honest with ourselves means letting go of some things. Sometimes these are entire identities. Other times, they may be jobs or relationships, or beliefs or ways of relating.
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The truth is somewhere else, as usual. And that somewhere else is not far away at all but rather right here. It is here in the tapping of keys, in the release of words.
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When I feel stress today, I will pause and ask myself: Is it an emergency? I am making this more stressful and complicated than it really is? What is the next step?
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You can cover the past / but until you speak the truth / you will never heal
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I want to live the stories, not just remember them.
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Isn't it funny how the thing we were so scared of can become our new normal, and then at some point, we will once again feel the winds changing and have to calmly reach for some kind of inner compass?
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The slightest fissure -- a hairline fracture in a massive piece of rock -- that is the place in a piece of writing where the whole story might break wide open.
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If I don't keep practicing letting this be enough, nothing will ever be enough.
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9. Get drowsy and take a nap, since you didn't sleep well last night. This logic adds up.
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I knew it was coming, like a low rumble in the distance before a storm.
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Action, emotion, intellect, spirit. To live predominantly in only one of these worlds is to miss so much information.
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You are not required to learn form these experiences, but your world will be richer and your relationships stronger if you do. And there is no avoiding them, lest we live in a fragile, entitled state of needing everything to go our way.
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